Remaining

Sippin tea from his hot mug. He put on his music to concentrate on his report. staring at the hourglass that commands him to wait, he impatiently taps his fingers on the mouse clicker. He tried to divert his impluses by staring at his keyboard. He kept his mind black, refrain from thinking about whats happening 56 kilometers away in south. He snapped back to reality and checked his download. 67% remaining.

"oh come on.."

Unconsciously, he was pulled back to a memory. How those eyes pierced him with the pain they hold. the lips of unspoken death he eagered not to touch with his own. She was the first person to love her. And he was the first to break her heart.

He pressed his eyelids shut as if they were switch off to the memory. but as soon as he opened them again, He saw the crater her dimples deepen as she laugh. how the stars in her eyes twinkle even more when she squinted. She was not the fairest of all, but boy was she right for him.

He felt his chest tighten. He hasn't felt this in years since that night. What could possibly remind him of her? He wish he knew. He looked back since the night he walked away from her. He remember, but forgot how tormenting was it to sleep through the nights. The process was tedious and long, just before he realized it, he got used to the pain until it became a part of him, until it was completely gone.

until now.

79% remaining.

He searched his memory once more. He wished that through remembering events, he'd remember how it used to feel as well. He found himself thinking about the begining. She was his best friend. He understood her. It felt so distant. He spun the slides and skipped to his afterlife without her. At the very thought, he was regretful of the time lost. he intended to use the time to heal woulds his father gave. to feed himself all the food he gave away to others. He needed the time.

91% remaining.

He could no longer contain his agitation, so he stood up and paced the room. He bent over and picked up the small metal thing he found in his drawer. at the sight of it, he felt blood rush to his eyes, it couldnt possibly be just there all along.

Download Complete.

He sat back on the chair and took a deep breath. He disguarded all the thoughts that plagued him. He knew better than to drown himself again. He paused. What goodness would it bring if he open the file? However, would he continue to live his life full of regrets? He knew very well that there's only one way he could do to find out.

Open.

The feeling was beyond words. He heard himself gave out a soft gasp. The color not hers. The design was simply too elegant; very far from her preferences. Or atleast he thought she did then. His eyes searched the invitation for the address. He knew he didnt have much time. Any moment now, Elaine will be back from the cafe and catch him going through her email. Upon seeing the information he was looking for, he deleted the file, stood up and went out.

He could still make it. Not to the one in the south, but the one in the invitation. His family will understand, he thought. let them wait. This one cannot. What makes him think he'll be able to get something he lost back is a punch to the moon, but he'd take his chances.

Fast forward. It was spinning. there was not much to tell except his decision. He will tell her.

There she was, oblivious to the ghost that watches. He looked at her with intent. She's exaclty the same from what he remembered. He took a step closer. Suddenly, he was overwhelmed by the series of retorts he expect to come as soon as she sees him. What right does he have to her again?  Does she still feel the same? Will she get her back? Will things, go the way it used to?

And their eyes met. you could tell that she was haunted as her lips part and her back stiffens. He stood infront of her. He tried not to step on her long white veil that sorrounds her.

He took out the lock he held from his pockets. Upon seeing it, he knew she remembered.

"all this time?" she asked softly

He smiled. the one that does not mean happiness, but plead. he intended to say more, but he was too dumbfounded by being around her after so a long time searching for something he wasnt sure what.
Until now. He had it all along. He smiled, but not the one that says happiness, rather pleads. He touched her face to lock her gaze back to him. He forced not to make his last breath too obvious as he prepares to say the one thing that contains his heart's desire:

"Not without you."